Tuesday, June 29, 2004

Slow road to the draft

'Ready Reserve' Members to See Duty Overseas

I don’t care how they try to sugarcoat it, this doesn’t sound good. Using troops who are already in service to fight a war is one thing. Calling up people who thought they were done with service is entirely different.

Imagine you worked at some fast food place to help pay your way through college. Then you graduate, get a real job, and move on with your life. You think you’re done with the burger barn. Then one day the phone rings and your old manager is on the other end telling you that you HAVE to come back to work because there’s a horrible fry cook shortage.

I assume most of these people will have established a life outside of the military. So what happens to that life? What happens to their jobs, and wives, and children, and mortgage payments, and car payments, and credit card payments, and all that crap? Is the military going to pay them the same wages they would have been making at their civilian jobs? I doubt it.

It sounds to me like the Pentagon is dipping its toe in the waters of involuntary service, trying to gage how the public will react. And this story has been out for roughly 24 hours without seeing much coverage at all on the cable news channels. Instead I turn on Fox News, and what do I see? Laci Peterson. That’s right, Uncle Sam is raping the spirit of an all volunteer military, and they are talking about some stupid rich bitch who got herself murdered in California over a year ago.

I have only ever had one question about the Laci Peterson story, and in roughly a year and a half of relentless coverage it still hasn’t been answered. My question is why should I give a fuck about Laci Peterson? They have been treating this case like the OJ trial, but there’s a huge difference between the two. OJ was FAMOUS!!!! He was a pro football player, and he had been in TV and movies. What have Laci Peterson, or Scott Peterson for that matter, ever done to warrant this kind of concern? Nothing! Not a God Damn thing!

Laci Peterson is famous for being murdered. And She wasn’t drawn and quartered, or beaten to death by rabid midgets, or sodomized to death by aliens. It was just your everyday run of the mill murder. So why is Scott Peterson’s stupid fat face on my TV screen when the whole country is going to hell in a Prada handbag?

I figure they must be talking about this ridiculous murder case because it’s Fox News after all, and we all know how fair and balanced they are. So I switch to CNN, and what are they talking about? Why pornography of course, what else would a good liberal news station be talking about? If you were ever in doubt that the courts of this country are run by liberals, this story should clear it up for you. Can you honestly imagine any Republican voting to block “congress's latest effort to curb children's access to sexually explicit material on the Internet”?

Back here on planet Earth no one in their right mind believes adults are computer savvy enough to keep their 13-year-old son from finding online smut. What we are concerned with is whether or not our 13-year-old son will be drafted in 5 years. He might just be, if no one makes any noise about this first step in that direction.

Iraq turnover meets approval of tiny redneck towns

County politicians approve of handover

Don’t worry everyone; you can put all of your skepticism to rest. The moronic hillbillies of this white trash nowhere county in the middle of Ohio think that handing over control of the Iraqi government 2 days early was a good decision. That’s a relief, for a minute I thought they might have done it to draw attention off of the US marine whose about to meet with the wrong side of an Islamic pocket knife.

Barbie takes half of Ken’s stuff

Barbie Finds New Australian Boyfriend

The divorce rate has gotten so high that even Barbie and Ken split up? Republicans are worried that allowing gay marriage will devastate the family unit in America. Doesn’t this prove that it’s a little late to be worrying about that now? Besides, what could be gayer than a wedding?

Muslims to behead their own.

In Utah, Many Pray for Marine's Safe Return

When this story first broke I didn’t realize that this guy was Muslim. This article is the first I’ve heard of it. It’s also one of the few times I’ve heard anything in the press about the Islamic community speaking out against the atrocities being committed in the name of their religion.

Will these maniacs butcher one of their own? Of course they will. I realize that there is a difference between the decapitation happy degenerates and the normal piece loving Muslims, but just read this statement from one of the good guys.

"In the name of Allah, the merciful, the compassionate, we accept destiny, with its good and bad," said Tarek Nasseir, a member of the Salt Lake City mosque serving as a spokesman for Hassoun's relatives here.
Ok, so they’re pretty quick to accept the barbarism that these radicals are soon to afflict upon Mr. Hassoun. I would think they might be outraged that these delinquents are giving Islam a bad name, but that’s just me. Nasseir continues.

"We are praying for all those people held captive against their will in Iraq," said Nameed Ahmed, a member of the mosque's governing council, "including those being held by the U.S. soldiers. We are against those who are holding our brother in Iraq, but we are also against the war that sent Mr. Hassoun to fight there."
He sounds like he’s angrier with the United States than with the “Islamic Retaliation Movement.” Hey buddy; we aren’t the ones brutalizing our prisoners of war…unless you seriously consider a gay human pyramid brutalizing. On a side note, if those pictures were taken in New York, they would have been considered modern art.

Anyway. Will the so-called “Islamic Retaliation Movement” release this guy because he’s a Muslim? Or will they lop his head off and finally prove what I have long suspected, that prayer doesn’t work?

Dirty Slut Barbie

Mattel loses court battle to defend Barbie's honour

Finally the ACLU does something worthwhile. I wouldn’t want to live in a country where an artist can’t take naked pictures of Barbie. This makes me wonder if Campbell’s ever tried to sue Andy Warhol?

Monday, June 28, 2004

Still cheaper than whiskey

Price of Gasoline Continues to Drop

So what? I’m supposed to be happy that the price has gone down by a lousy 7 cents a gallon? A price drop like this just means they are pacifying everyone in preparation for another jump. The prices will stay down for a few weeks, and everyone will say, thank goodness gas is only 1.90 per gallon. Then they will raise it back up to about 2.20, and everyone will be pissed off again. Then it will go back down to about 2.00 a gallon, and everyone will say, thank God we’re finally getting some relief. They’ve been doing this forever.

If we went to Iraq to take their oil, then why are the prices still going up? OPEC will use anything for an excuse to drive up the prices. Another terrorist bombing? Yup, that’s going to bring them up. A train derailed somewhere in Texas? Oh, that’s going to cost you. Your little brother Johnny just came out of the closet? Shit, we may have to start rationing.

Sunday, June 27, 2004

It’s not how you play the game…

Green party snubs Ralph Nader

So basically, they want to have a candidate, but they don’t want to get too many votes. Do you think the Bush campaign will be more concerned about this, or Fahrenheit 9/11?


Saturday, June 26, 2004

Shut up and get a Big Mac

Olsen twin latest celebrity to battle eating disorder in public

You think she’ll have to actually gain weight to make it into Playboy? Or do you thin they would just airbrush over the bones showing through her skin? And don’t even try to tell me they won’t be in Playboy. That’s just ludicrous.

Rodney King Part Deux and 1/2

Officer may have feared man beaten during LAPD arrest was armed

What did I tell you? Read this line from the first article.

[Police Chief William] Bratton said Miller's minor injuries included a bruised cheek. He was treated at a hospital, released and remained jailed on $30,000 bail.
Now read first line to this follow up article.

A Los Angeles police officer caught on videotape pummeling a suspected car thief with a flashlight said he delivered the blows because another officer warned the man was carrying a gun, the Los Angeles Times reported Saturday.
“Pummeling,” sounds like a pretty harsh word. Are they trying to start another race riot? To make things worse, this guy’s scumbag lawyer is acting like his client was nearly beaten to death. Read this.
his lawyer argued that he should be released so he can receive medical treatment for any injuries suffered during the beating.
Miller complained of dizziness, difficulty breathing and a swollen nose, Werksman said.
"I can't underscore to you enough that this man needs to see a doctor," he said.
Yeah, he started complaining after he spoke with this lawyer. The guy was already taken to a hospital, and now they are acting like they just beat him for no reason and threw him in a jail cell without so much as a Band-Aid.

"I'm demanding an explanation," Mayor James K. Hahn said at a City Hall news conference Friday. "It better be a good one. It looks to me that force was unwarranted."
These cops are already being convicted, before anyone knows what happened.

Friday, June 25, 2004

I sold out

I’ve only had this site up for about a day, but I’ve already sold out. Please notice the gratuitous links at the bottom of the left hand column, brought to you by www.bloglinker.com

If you couldn’t guess, this is the obligatory mention this so called traffic generating site requires of its members. Don’t worry, once I get some notoriety (I estimate this will happen sometime by 2047) I will remove this post, and those damn links immediately.

Lars Ulrich will finally be able to sleep

Senate OKs fines for illegal downloading

Thank God the government is finally going to step in and do something about this problem. Worrying about terrorism is SO 2 years ago, and I’m glad that we are moving on at last, and that now the government can “bring its resources to bear on this immense problem.”

It’s good to know that America still has good statesmen like Sen. Patrick Leahy of Vermont, who isn’t afraid to get out there and fight for the little guy. I can’t think of a better way to address the concerns of American citizens than to pass a law that allows the government to help GIANT corporations sue college students for downloading a copy of the latest Britney Spears single. Clearly the American people have been demanding this law for a long time.

Rodney King Part Duex

Use of force prompts concerns about LAPD reforms

Here we go again. I haven’t seen the video yet, but I have no doubt this will be blow out of proportion. The Rodney King video was taken out of context to make it look a lot worse than it really was. In 1991 the jury was the only group of people who saw the part of the tape that showed a cracked out King repeatedly jumping up to attack the cops until he was finally subdued. I’m sure they’ll do the same with this tape.

After a “30-minute pursuit” and a 300 yard foot chase, I’m sure the only video that will ever make it on the news will be the very moment when the guy finally gives up and is tackled to the ground. I don’t know why anyone would find this so shocking; they show it on COPS all the time. If someone has been running from the cops, they are going to get tackled if they stop. That’s just how it works. What are they supposed to do? Should they calmly walk up to this creep after they’ve been chasing him for 30-minutes and politely ask him to lie on the ground?

Make sure you notice the quote at the end of this article.
"The cops are all bad," said Gerald Murrle, 40. "If they say cover it up, they'll cover it up."
Who the hell is Gerald Murrle? He’s not mentioned anywhere else in the story. How is he connected to this story? Did they just go door-to-door looking for someone who hates cops to give them a quote?

Maybe they did. But don’t worry, they evened things out with another quote from someone else no one has ever heard of.
Others believed the incident will test the leadership of [Police Chief William] Bratton.

"This is his first big test," said Vickie Goolsby, 43. "But it's going to take time to change things, because he's got too many corrupt police officers on the force."
Even the positive quote is pretty negative. Who the hell is Vickie Goolsby? And how would she know anything about how many cops are corrupt? This is indicative of how this story is going to be treated on the major news networks.

Blame it on Slavery

Judge rejects slave trauma as defense for killing

This is a great idea for criminal defense. It may not have been allowed during pretrial, but the fact that the judge is considering it at all is kind of scary. Imagine the precedent that will be set if this works during the actual trial.

I could go for a Lewinsky...handbag

Lewinsky Feels Betrayed

So Monica Lewinsky got her feelings hurt by Bill Clinton’s book. What makes her think she’s so God Damn special? She got famous by giving slick Willy a hummer, and now she’s mad because he still won’t acknowledge that they had a real relationship.

The most expensive BJ in history happened well over 5 years ago, and this stupid bitch still wants to think that they had something special? Give me a break. Sure he might have shown you some affection, and pretended like he cared about you, but guys do this all the time. Sure he might have shown you some affection, and pretended like he cared about you, but guys do this to get laid all the time. Every day hundreds of women around the country get knocked up by some sleaze bag who fooled them into thinking that he really gave a shit.

Get over yourself Monica; you’re not the first young naive girl to get sweet talked into a quick trip downtown. Any woman with a brain would have realized by now that she was used, it meant nothing to the guy, and it’s time to move on. Your name might be synonymous with oral sex now, but at least you were able to start a lucrative handbag business. So quit your bitching.

Thursday, June 24, 2004

yippy, another blogger

Just what the freaking world needs, another God Damn Blogger. Well here I am, another faceless soldier in an army of ubiquitous blabbermouths. Another narcissist, hopeful that my inane chatter will lead me to the promise land. How pathetic.